Mom's Favorite Breakfast
Okay, kids, here’s how to make Mom the traditional breakfast-in-bed!
First let’s make some eggs. Take the carton out of the fridge. Mop up the ones that fell onto the floor with a dishtowel (make sure you leave the eggy dishtowel on the counter). Crack one egg into a frying pan, then turn the burner on, up as high as possible. Wait for it to stick like glue to the bottom of the pan. Scrape it out into the sink and start over, adding half a stick of butter this time. Success! Transfer the egg to a plate, being careful to preserve the jiggly whites surrounding the raw yolk (the burnt bottom should help). Don’t forget to season! About a tablespoon of salt should be enough. And, you know how much mom likes pepper – so unscrew the cap from the pepper shaker and pour on some pepper.
Next, let’s add some oatmeal. It’s like cereal, only hot, right? So take the canister out of the cupboard and pour some in a bowl, filling it up almost all the way, and then add some milk, just like cereal. Microwave it for 2 minutes. It’s still not soft, so try another 2 minutes. And another. Go ahead and do it for 10 minutes, then. Remove the bowl from the microwave and wipe out the microwave with that same dishtowel you used for the eggs, and try to get most of the boiled-over oats off the side of the bowl. There’s still about half the oats left in the bowl, so add some more milk to fill it the rest of the way. Top with enough pancake syrup to form a glaze over the top.
Toast is easy. Just keep pressing the lever back down when the bread pops up! Repeat until the smoke alarm goes off. If it looks too black, just pour lots of jam on top.
Of course, it wouldn’t be complete without some coffee! Fill one of the filters up to the top and put it in the basket. She usually has two cups, you remember, so add two cups of water to the machine’s tank (use one of the measuring cups in the drawer to measure – the medium one with a “1/2″ on the handle should be about right – it probably means “one or two cups”). Turn on the machine and wait until the grounds start leaking out the side. Pour the resulting two ounces of liquid into a coffee mug and spoon out as many of the grounds as you can. Decide to give her a special treat and give her buttermilk instead of cream – that must be even better than cream. Add it to fill the mug the rest of the way.
And, remember how mom likes us to eat healthy things? Add a few carrots – she’ll love that!
Finally, pile all your items on the tray, wrapping up a spoon and a fork and a steak knife in a paper napkin. Take the dandelions you picked yesterday out of your pocket and fill a jar with some water, and place the dandelions inside.
Be careful walking up the stairs with the tray! Always stop to pick up each item as you go – ’cause Mom hates to waste things! And make sure to tell Mom she doesn’t have to clean up the kitchen for a whole hour. It’s her special day!
Mom will be so happy that she will cry and give you lots of hugs and kisses, we promise!
–posted by Mom Donna and Daughter Anne
